BBQ rib painting.

Labels: fine art, humor, redneck, video

"A collection of anonymously contributed client horror stories from designers."

Clients From Hell

Labels: Clients From Hell, graphic design, humor, resource

There hasn't been a "religious figures in random objects" post in well over a year, so this group of 25 images from Holy Taco should make up for lost time. By the way, this image of KitKat Jesus is absolutely fantastic.

Be Advised : There is a pic with a more-naked-than-not female on the link page of which your grandmother would not approve.

25 Holy Images In Everyday Things

Labels: Holy Taco, humor, Jesus sighting, KitKat Jesus

I admit that I'm unfamiliar with Ross Kemp, but that certainly doesn't dampen my enthusiasm for a site dedicated entirely to folded images of his head.

Kemp Folds

Labels: humor, photography, Ross Kemp

Here’s a little Friday afternoon humor for you.

This video proves that the power of the censor beep is pretty amazing. The implied impropriety can transform an innocent child’s show into something that would make my Grandmother blush. Just keep in mind, the mystery word is ‘count.’

*Questionable workplace viewing*

Labels: humor, The Count Censored, video

My vegetarian readers will absolutely love this post — because if anyone can appreciate flattened, dried, and rigor mortised animal flesh, it’s the salad and tofu lovers.

Now I’m usually of the opinion that good is good. Meat = good. Business Cards = good. Unexpected concepts = good. However, I’m having a difficult time condoning flesh engraved business cards — it’s just wrong. Not morally wrong mind you, more like, everyone-will-be-disgusted-that-you-just-pulled-a-sheet-of-meat-out-of-your-pants-pocket kind of wrong. Sorry, but that’s just the way it is.

In my estimation, there are only three professions that could possess such an item and avoid utter revulsion: a butcher, a pig farmer and a beef jerky entrepreneur. Vice President of a global investment firm, not so much. Sorry, Mr. Bateman.

Lingering unresolved questions:

1. What is the best method for trimming out the individual business cards from the “sheet,” x-acto, carpenter’s knife or table saw?

2. What is the temperature of the average day-worn pants pocket?

3. How long can beef jerky stay in a day-worn pants pocket before it begins to emit a fragrance?

4. Must you pay for cards that omit vital information due to a hole or defect in the meat?

5. Can the cards be spot varnished to add an additional level of interest?

6. If received, would I put a meat card in my Rolodex? Hmmm...

Meat Cards

(Thanks to Tom at LPK for the link)

Labels: graphic design, humor, Meat cards, resource

Vitamin deficient food-collage mascots?

I’m still trying to wrap my mind around the perplexing concept, but nevertheless, it would appear these were real advertisements...

Dayalets

Labels: ad campaign, Dayalets, humor, sculpture

WARNING...Sense of humor required.









Tom’s running diary of things he learned while watching these graphic design career videos:

1. When discussing your qualifications, be sure to keep your awards and diploma visible at all times

2. Awards and praise let designers know that what they’re doing is “making a difference”

3. An Associates Degree will allow you to “go places”

4. Design elements should be integrated into the design

5. If a sports team has a preexisting color scheme, you may want to incorporate those colors into their design work

6. There are many different ways you can apply for different jobs

7. Clients like to pick-and-choose design elements

8. Clients really like “energy bursts”

9. Clients probably won’t like your font or color choices

10. Clients like to put their logo on their worker’s jackets

11. Clients will be happy with the end results, as long as they’re given variety


When producing a set of graphic design career videos, always remember to:

1. Sit in front of a computer that is older than your teenage child

2. Never turn down the volume on your monitor — it allows your audience to appreciate the sounds of the world’s first screen saver

3. Never edit your footage to make your career video better

4. Rarely make eye contact with the camera, but be sure to look down-and-to-the-left and to the producer standing to the side of the camera as often as possible

5. Never waste time writing a script, they are overrated — your audience will appreciate your ability to “keep it real”

Labels: graphic design, graphic design career videos, humor, resource, video

You would assume that a show that thinks as highly of its intellect as Jeopardy does, would employ someone smart enough to know the difference between a quotation mark and inch mark. Surely someone on that staff graduated with a degree in Journalism and owns a copy of The Chicago Manual of Style...I’m just sayin’.

Labels: graphic design, humor, Jeopardy

Here’s a little Thursday afternoon humor for all the hard and hardly-working folks that decided to check out the blog on this fine day.

I really like the specificity of many of the ‘bad things’ that have been compiled for this list, but often times I just don’t agree. Having “the fed ex guy tell you a dirty joke,” is hardly in the same ballpark as “the girl you like turns out to be a man” — of course that’s just this guy’s opinion. Enjoy.

Bad Things That Can Happen To You

Labels: Bad Things That Can Happen To You, humor

What a lovely photo taken by Nick Daggy for the Dayton Daily News. Mmmm...greasy green sandwich with melted cheese.

Labels: Dayton Daily News, humor, Nick Daggy, St .Patrick’s Day

Thanks go out to Dan for sending me the link to this fine food packaging.

While I have concerns about the overall typographic choices and unappetizing use of poorly lit product photography, I am even more befuddled by the product itself.

What are pork brains? Wouldn’t brains need to come from a specific living entity? Pork, as I understand it, is not a specific living entity. Perhaps they are pig brains? Was using the descriptor pig brains instead of pork brains considered too risky from a sales standpoint?

I’m at a loss.

I must admit though, the cholesterol intake per serving is phenomenal. I wonder if the designer called the client to confirm that the 1170% wasn’t a typo?

Pork Brains via The Consumerist

Labels: graphic design, humor, Pork Brains in Milk Gravy, The Consumerist

Agency Fusion has created an infomercial style video for the fictitious Make My Logo Bigger Cream.

While the idea of designers poking fun at clients for wanting a huge logo is not new, the video still tends to be more clever than not — albeit overly repetitive and borderline annoying with the multiple product variations at the middle and end of the piece.

Make my Logo Bigger video

Labels: Agency Fusion, graphic design, humor, interactive design, resource, video

If you were searching for typographic inspiration coupled with the avoidance of direct confrontation — passive aggressive notes has you covered.

passive aggressive notes

Labels: blog, humor, passive aggressive notes, resource

This clip is probably 250 seconds longer than it needs to be, but I can forgive the length because this may be the most fantastic flying sequence ever committed to celluloid.

Inadequate special effects are typically susceptible to harsh criticism and disbelief, but this video actually hits that sweet spot between terrible, high comedy and camp.

The shadows from where the actors are standing on the floor are a fabulous touch. Well done.

Labels: Bollywood, flying, humor, Superman, video

If you’re in search of a unique lawn ornament and have $40,000 in spare pocket change, then this is your lucky day.

Meet Camarasaurus, the adorable 18' tall fiberglass sculpture that your kids and graffiti artists will love and your neighbors will certainly envy.

Camarasaurus

Labels: design, humor, sculpture

Well...I guess some people notice mistakes, while others just tend to skim.

Labels: Comedy Central, humor, resource

What’cha gonna do, what’cha gonna do when they come for you.

Design Police

Labels: Design Poliece, graphic design, humor, resource

WARNING: Naked Painter Alert!


Does this entry constitute legitimate artistic consideration, or has the blog hit an all-time low? I’ll let you decide.

Based on the quality of the work, Tim Patch is not an artist I would typically bring attention to. I hate to call him a novelty because I have much respect for anyone who loves to create, but his “thing” is penile painting. Yes, his work is produced by applying paint to his penis and using it as a brush.

Classy.

His site is semi-tame, but it may raise eyebrows from your boss or human resource department. As I have neither a boss nor a human resource, I find it to be perfectly acceptable viewing.

Pricasso

Labels: artist, humor, Tim Patch

MOBA showcases a rotating collection of 400 bad artworks, all within the confines of the museum’s galleries — two Massachusetts basements.

I have to admit, I really like a lot of the collection’s pieces. This portrait of Peter the Kitty by Mrs. Jackson is fantastic — the hole in the middle of the canvas just adds to the appeal.

MOBA

Labels: fine art, humor, Museum of Bad Art, museums

Well, it’s time once again for me to venture off into the holidays, and as a parting-gift, I offer this drawing and informational text from Kris, who appears to have an advanced degree in Zoology with a focus in Ornithology, specifically, the Snowy Owl...

The snowy owl is white with brown spots. Its scientific name is Nyctea scandiaca. It lives in the northen tundra where it blends in well with its surroundings. The snowy owl only visits Pennsylvania in the winter. The snowy owl’s favorite food is lemmings. Lemmings are little mammals that look like mice. The unusual thing about the snowy owl is that its feathers cover its feet. Its enemies are the wolves and the artic fox. -Kris

Winter Bird Goodness

Labels: holiday, humor, Snowy Owl

Please note that studiotwentysix2 does not advocate criminal activities, including, but not limited to: breaking and entering, grand theft auto, finding a penny and picking it up, kicking, biting, extreme pillow fighting and public intoxication and/or urination.

That being said, if you happen to be arrested for such conduct, I reserve the right to giggle at your expense — especially if you are a large man equipped with udders.

The Smoking Gun

Labels: humor, mug shot, The Smoking Gun

I apologize for my recent absence, but my services were requested on short notice for an out-of-town business meeting. I realize I can’t make up for lost time, but I have a feeling that the stylings of Thor ~ Erics may brighten your day — and as my friend so eloquently stated upon seeing Thor, “Top right dude is who I’d want to party with.”

Amen, brother. Amen.

Labels: humor, Thor ~ Erics, update

’Tis the time of year that we give thanks for vandalized business signs, gigantic turkey sculptures and the awkwardly posed gentlemen who love them.

I’ll be back next week.

Labels: holiday, humor, turkey

I couldn’t have said it any better myself.

About the poster

Labels: humor, poster, vote

Maybe it has to do with my age, or possibly just nostalgia, but I love the trend of using Mario Paint Composer to arrange well-known music. It’s great because the program is simple yet capable of complexity, fun to watch, and just so darn campy. The music system was originally created for Mario Paint on the Super NES, however contemporary remakes have found their way onto the internet, including this downloadable version by unFun Games. Enjoy.

Labels: games, humor, Mario Paint Composer, video

Juvenile, amateurish and cliché...you bet. But how many other sites allow you to sprinkle pixie-dust on a smoking Chihuahua, under a disco ball? Yep, that’s what I thought.

Blingee

Labels: Blingee, humor

Wow.

Labels: humor, video

For whatever reason, I just love old objects: books, photographs, toys, clothes and printed ephemera. These objects can help you learn so much about the style and craftsmanship of an era. I wasn’t born until the mid 1970s, so the only way for me to learn about the past, is through the documentation of that time.

As it turns out, I recently came across the super-informative Creative Needlework book, published in 1969. Creative Needlework is more like a historical photo-essay than a book, as it really helped me to better understand the culture and style of the late-sixties. Here’s a sampling of what I learned:

Parents and children liked to dress in the exact same clothes. Apparently, this phenomenon was known as Carbon Copies, as in: The youngster is a carbon copy of his dad. From the photo documentation available, this seems to have gone over much better with girls, as the mom and daughter seem to be enjoying themselves — the guys, not so much. Poor little green vest seems terrified, and little gray vest has lost his inspiration. Oh, I also learned that guys in 1969 wanted to be famous movie directors and enjoyed smoking corncob pipes.


Boys were hot for boys in 1969. I actually feel bad for the women in these photographs, as they are treated like mere window dressing, and couldn’t be the center of attention even if they were oiled-up and dressed in négligées. I learned through these photos that guys enjoy v-neck sweaters, trains and bananas.



In 1969, there was a pandemic of color blindness, as well as hundreds of accidental deaths due to pencil impalement. It wasn’t until 1973, that Richard Nixon enacted the, “Save a life, store your pencils tip-down” campaign. That sure was a smart campaign.


Global warming and variations in temperature peaked in 1969. At one point, conditions became so bad, that the temperature between ground level and five-feet high would produce averages of 80 degrees Fahrenheit; however, the air currents above five-feet dramatically cooled to approximately 36 degrees Fahrenheit. It appears even sculptures were affected by this freak occurrence.



Finally, I was shocked to find that only white children existed in 1969. I felt that this had to be an oversight, but no commercial photography could be located to prove otherwise. Of the white people that did exist, it seems that only parents of shy, uncomfortable and slightly awkward children, allowed their offspring to be filmed by strangers.






Wow, 1969 seemed pretty awful. I’m just glad I was alive for the 80’s — now that I would have hated to miss.

Labels: 1969, ephemera, humor, needlework

***Random post alert***

I really try my best to keep the blog focused on art and design, but sometimes I can’t help but get sidetracked — what can I say, it helps keep me sane.

Labels: humor

I love when legitimate news organizations try to increase readership with gratuitous stories attempting to be passed off as “news.”

Take for instance this beauty by the folks at NBC. They needed twenty different pictures of super-fit international volleyball ass (and one face), in order to accompany the “gallery story” that consisted entirely of, “Hand signals are frequently used by beach volleyball players to communicate to their partners. The signals -- one or two fingers down, closed fist, etc. -- generally let their partner know who should attempt a block at the net on their opponents’ return.”

Just once, I’d love to see them write what they actually mean:

Hi, we’re NBC. The Olympics will soon be upon us, and our sponsors would love it if you tuned in daily. We just wanted to remind you that one of our featured events will be women’s volleyball. Man, those Brazilians sure are hot, and we at NBC love their little outfits. So please enjoy these photos, and if you would like to watch the real thing, tune into the Olympics on NBC. Oh yeah, and they do these really cool hand signals too.

Cracking the code

Labels: article, humor, photography

It’s a long weekend for me...going out-of-town in a few hours to visit family, and then driving to the Radiohead concert in Indianapolis, Sunday night. I’ve been a fan of theirs since Pablo Honey, and am pretty excited because I’ve yet to see them perform live.

I’ll leave it up to Joe Esposito to start the weekend off right with an ass kickin’ Daniel Laruso video.




Jesus Sighting Update!!!

Man, do I love a good Jesus sighting. When somebody sends me a photo, or I come across a news story with the title, “Jesus face appears in Alabama couple’s potato salad”, I’m like a kid in a candy store. Rarely am I ever disappointed, and when I saw the recent headline, “Family Claims to See Jesus in Cat Fur”, I was downright giddy. But alas, disappointment ensued.




Jesus Sighting Update, Update!!!

I was so upset with my inability to see Jesus in these cat photos, that I magnified the image x 6400, and sure enough, Jesus is there. You might have to squint your eyes a bit, and turn your head slightly to the left, just as the sun is setting, but trust me, He’s there. *


* Oh snap, who just got punk’d? It’s really just my cat with a painting of Jesus slapped on. Try not to be so gullible next time.

Labels: humor, Jesus sighting, music, video

Labels: graphic design, humor, video

A wise man once told me that enthusiasm is contagious, but enthusiasm with a double-helping of thumbs, can move mountains.

Oh yeah, he also told me that sometimes penguins mutate, bourbon is best in the morning, and discarded newspapers make an excellent form of insulation...oh, and crack is whack, can’t forget that one.

Labels: humor

***Completely Random Post Alert***

I can’t recall a 5-minute period where I have been simultaneously intrigued and repulsed, all while psychoanalyzing and laughing my ass off — it is quite unprecedented. What you are about to hear, is exceptional.

Ladies, this will give you the creeps, and will probably trigger instant flashbacks to every “that guy” who has ever approached you. Guys, as long as you’re not “that guy”, you will take much pleasure in the failings of a man who so utterly deserves it. The Internet was invented for things such as this — enjoy.

How Not to Get a Date

Labels: humor

Let me state for the record that I’m neither a sadist, nor an advocate of violence.

However...

If this unfortunate woman must endure a kangaroo punch to the chin, in order for this glorious photograph to exist, then I say punch away Mr. Kangaroo, punch away.

Labels: humor, photography

Immature, juvenile, sophomoric and unsophisticated...absolutely, but there is an unmistakable hint of brilliance. Who knew rope could function as informational signage?

Gotta Go

Labels: graphic design, humor

Outstanding.

Sauna Pants

Labels: graphic design, humor, photography

I swear, this 1943 article from Transportation Magazine is utterly shocking and disrespectful. The magazine’s blatant lack of sensitivity towards “underweight” individuals is downright reprehensible. The article insists on belittling not only the hand washers, but also the baggy dressers of the world.

Let it be known that I am personally offended by this hack job disguised as useful information, but there is one point that I find absolutely inexcusable...vociferously. Who writes like that? If you believe that vociferous was part of everyday 1943 language, then I think you are probably misinformed, or a smarty-pants, or you own a dictionary with a built-in thesaurus. Yep, I got you pegged.

Disgusted readers can fight the good fight, NOW!

Labels: 1943, article, humor, NOW, Transportation Magazine

Dear Mr. Foot Mark,

I realize you were huge during the days of the mechanical typewriter and early word processor, but unfortunately, your time has come and gone. Don’t get me wrong, you’re still a handy fellow, engineers and architects couldn’t live a day without you — but please, for the love of typography and proper punctuation, stop stealing my thunder.

It’s typically not my disposition to kick a brother when he’s down, but you look like crap. Why do you insist on constantly showing up uninvited and underdressed? It’s like arriving at prom wearing cheeky shorts, a bib and a paper crown from Burger King — it just lacks class. You’re like the embarrassing uncle who thinks he’s the cat’s meow. I’m sorry...but you’re just not cool.

So stop this nonsense, and please tell your designers and editors at ESPN.com to pick up a friggin’ style guide every decade or so, in hopes that one of their several hundred employees might say, “Huh, that headline looks kind of weird, are we certain that punctuation is correct?” Please, I’m begging you.

Your Friend and Successor,

Apostrophe

Labels: graphic design, humor